Gigli: The First of Affleck’s Embarrassments



DIRECTED BY: Martin Brest

STARRING: Ben Affleck, Jennifer Lopez, Justin Bartha

GENRE: Romantic Comedy

YEAR: 2003

COUNTRY: United States

A lowly thug, Gigli, is assigned to kidnap the psychologically challenged younger brother of a powerful federal prosecutor to save his mobster boss from incarceration. Staked-out in his one-bedroom apartment with his kidnap victim, Brian, Gigli soon realizes that what he thought would be a routine assignment soon becomes a tumultuous task. Ricki, a gorgeous, free-spirited female gangster is sent to assist Gigli with the kidnapping because his boss does not think that Gigli is up to the job. But when his feelings for the decidedly unavailable Ricki begin to grow, and he actually becomes concerned for Brian, tough guy Gigli begins to transform into an actual human being…which considering his profession could be a very dangerous occupation.Screen Shot 2013-02-20 at 4.50.27 PM

I approached the most mocked movie of the year ignoring the months of anti-hype, scattered behind-the-scenes turmoil, and the media blitzkrieg that set out to destroy the creation known as “Bennifer,” the conjoining of stars Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez. Gigli is not the Thanksgiving turkey that the minions of star-haters would have you believe. Rather, it is a highly curious film that is not so much poor as it is the victim of its own unfortunate media backlash.

From his opening lines, it becomes clear that Affleck’s performance is utterly terrible. Clad in a series of bowling shirts, leather jackets, and wifebeaters, and with his hair slicked back, Affleck’s Gigli is like a hyperchauvinistic parody of Travolta’s Chili Palmer inGet Shorty, and speaks—nay, yells—all his lines in an absurd Jersey accent.

Tgigli-945he sexual politics of Gigli are so last century. Gigli views Ricki as a lesbian who can be turned straight by his relentless machismo, while Ricki’s version of flirting with Gigli consists of undercutting it (usually by calling him “gay,” or asking if he’s gay). Unlike another Affleck vehicle, Chasing Amy, this film presents the male fantasy of scaring a lesbian straight via their masculinity in such outrageously dumb fashion that it’s offensive. And, when Gigli and Ricki eventually get down and dirty, Lopez kicks off the proceedings by spreading her legs, and unleashing this head-scratcher of an oral sex invite: “It’s turkey time … Gobble gobble.”


  • A curious film plagued by bad press.


  • “Turkey Time”.
  • Poor main cast performance.
  • Sexual politics.
  • Failed accents.

SCORE: 3.5 / 10

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The Hangover Part III: Finally Rid of that Wild One Night

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TITLE: The Hangover Part III
DIRECTOR: Tod Phillips
YEAR: 2013
COUNTRY: United States

The Hangover Part III lets audiences rejoin the Wolfpack in an entirely different way then the last two films. Todd Phillips finally realized that what people want from The Hangover is more Alan and Chow. That is what exactly this version of The Hangover gives audiences, but it disappoints because Ed Helms and Bradley Cooper have fallen into the background completely. This is definitely an Alan and Chow show.

Granted I’m definitely not saying that it is a bad thing. We get to see a very dark and twisted side of Alan (yes even more than the last two films). Oh and Chow? He is definitely even more insane than the last two films, except now he is stealing gold from John Goodman. You don’t steal John Goodman’s gold. One of my favorite scenes is early in the film where Alan causes a 20 car pileup and accidentally kills his pet giraffe.

. While I really didn’t want to see this one, as I did not have very high expectations for it at all. Although, I have to said that it did pass what little expectations that existed. They finally got rid of their “tried and true” formula, but still pay homage to it with a post credits scene.

Overall, it wasn’t half bad to change up the formula, but it was nice to homage to that one wild night that captivated us oh so many years ago.


  • Finally ditched the “Wild One Night” premise.
  • Darker side of Allan.
  • Back to Vegas!
  • John Goodman!!!
  • Ken Jeong steals the show.


  • Ed Helms still only comic relief.
  • Bradley Cooper gets lost in the story (no longer that important)
  • Main characters almost become background characters.
  • Justin Bartha, why are you still here?

SCORE: 6.0 / 10 Stars

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